The Journey

Continued Prayers

2012-01-15T20:33:00.002-06:00

Please pray for Celeste Green's father, Dan Scott. You can read about him here:

http://www.noelgreen.com/Dan

Celeste is one of the kindest people I've ever met.

Say a prayer for...

2012-01-13T04:47:00.002-06:00

Please pray for Dr. Charles Siburt as he fights cancer. You can follow his journey here:
http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/charlessiburt

Dr. Siburt has been a teacher, mentor, and friend. He has shared wisdom and guidance when I need it. I'm a better minister because of him.

2012

2012-01-04T17:45:00.002-06:00

In 2012, I want to...

- pay off my credit card.

- fall in love.

- kick the addiction to soda.

- exercise regularly.

- memorize more scripture.

- give more and take less.

- love more and judge less.

- blog more.

- write that book.

- find a healthy relationship with food.

- call my brothers more often.

That's a pretty good start.

On Katrina

2010-08-28T21:31:00.004-05:00

Inspired by others who have done the same today, I thought I'd recount some of my experiences following Hurricane Katrina. When the hurricane hit, I'd just started a grad program in Abilene, Texas. Like most people, I couldn't take my eyes off the constant coverage of the disaster. I wrote this blog entry a few days later:

I got the chance to watch Oprah this afternoon. I usually don't watch the show but I happened to see that she would be talking about the Hurricane, so I tuned in. The current conditions of the people living in Louisiana are unbelievable. Dead bodies are everywhere. If a person is about to die, they go ahead and take the body to the make shift morgue so the person can die in peace. What a tragedy when the morgue is the most peaceful place to die. Oprah got to go into the Superdome and there was water, urine, and feces covering the floor. Thankfully, no one is living there any more. As I watched the show I felt so helpless. All I want to do with my life is love God by loving and serving people. I wish so badly that there was something I could do to help these people. I just feel stuck here.

I titled that blog Helpless and I remember feeling so helpless at the time. Here I was sitting around the Graduate School of Theology with a bunch of future ministers talking about what it means to live an incarnational life, all the while thousands of people were one state away and living without water. Sometimes it feels like the Christian walk is so much talk and so little action.

Thankfully, I was able to put that Christian walk into action several months later when I traveled to New Orleans with the youth group I was interning for. It's funny, at the time I had no idea I would soon be working with that youth group full time. I was very nervous about that trip to New Orleans. I had broken my foot a few weeks earlier and I knew I would be very limited physically. I certainly was, and again felt such a feeling of helplessness as I watched my teens work so hard. I remember having so many thoughts and emotion swirling around in my head and heart. Here's the blog I wrote soon after we returned:

We returned from New Orleans a couple of hours ago and I have so many thoughts. I know my words can't really do justice to the experience I just had, but I'll try.
First of all, I have to brag on my kids. They were awesome, bigger than awesome. Our job was to go into these houses that hadn't been touched in 10 months and clear out all of the belongings- couches, dressers, refrigerators, clothes, books, food, EVERYTHING, then we had to strip the house down to just the studs. The church we were staying at and working through expected our group to get three houses done, my incredible kids got ten houses done. That's more than any of the groups that have come through that church. I didn't hear the kids complain about the work a single time. We had to force them to take water breaks. They wanted to stay and work as late as possible each day. I am so proud of them.
When we got to New Orleans we went down to the French Quarter which didn't seem to have much damage from the hurricane. This area is very old, it looks like old cities in Europe (at least what I think those cities look like). New Orleans definitely rivals Las Vegas for the title of sin city. The closer you walked to Bourbon Street the stronger the smell of alcohol got. I'm sure my teenage boys got an eye full more than once. There was an overwhelming feeling of loss and hopelessness in the city. The people are weary and tired.
When we left the French Quarter we took the kids down to the 9th Ward, a poor neighborhood that was pretty much wiped out by the storm. The destruction was worse than I had imagined. We saw houses that were literally turned over on their side. The few brick houses in this neighborhood held together pretty well, but all of the other houses were completely lifted off their foundation. The flood water was higher than the roofs and didn't start going down for at least two weeks. Nothing and no one survived this storm. Each house had a spray painted number on it of the number of bodies found in it. This place was a ghost town. There was not sign of life anywhere. We drove down one street and saw a man working on his house. We got out and talked to him and prayed with him. He told us about an decorative angel that was on his roof that made it through the storm and still sits on the roof. There are signs of God everywhere.
The neighborhood we worked in was an average middle class area. It reminded me of the neighborhood I grew up in. Just imagine your house submerged in water for two weeks then left for 10 months. Everything was still wet, covered in mold, and completely filthy. I've never seen anything this nasty. We had to wear masks to protect our lungs and prevent nose bleeds. I just pray that our kids didn't breathe in anything that will affect them later. Our homeowners didn't know what they were going to do. It hasn't been decided whether these neighborhoods will be rebuilt or just completely demolished and returned to marsh land. I kept asking myself, who would build a city on a swamp?
I still have lots of questions and unresolved feelings about New Orleans. I'll probably write more about it. The one thing I know is this city must be redeemed. Not just physically, but spiritually, emotionally, and mentally. That is my prayer for New Orleans.

Watching the news coverage about Katrina this week has filled me with the same emotions and questions I had 5 years ago. So many feelings about the importance of home in a person's life, the value of under-resourced (poor) people in our country, the appropriate response of government in situations of disaster as well as the response of churches and Christians.

I'll end with the same prayer I had at the time: May God redeem us.

2009-09-23T23:03:00.001-05:00

Happy Fall Everyone!

Meet Molly

2009-07-30T17:34:00.005-05:00

Yesterday I became a first time pet owner. I adopted Molly, a four year old beagle, from a local shelter. She is wonderful! She's very sweet and only goes potty on the grass!! The teens love her and she really enjoyed all the attention they gave her last night. So, with 24 hours down, all I can say is so far-so good!

2009-05-15T23:29:00.001-05:00

Ahhh, what a nice birthday.

2009-05-11T20:23:00.002-05:00

Is anyone following the Jon and Kate drama? I'm very nervous about Jon's fidelity. I watched Kate on Today the other day and she seemed really sad. What are your thoughts out there people?

2009-05-10T11:59:00.005-05:00

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!

2009-05-05T22:17:00.002-05:00

When did total nerd come back in style? I've been seeing this look a lot lately:

Surprisingly, this look seems to be absolutely intentional. The trendy Starbucks worker and Borders clerk are now sporting the mullet and big glasses. They say everything old becomes new again. I guess everything nerdy becomes cool at some point. I'm thinking of getting out my glasses and putting some masking tape around the nose piece. I'll do anything to be cool.

2009-04-21T20:31:00.002-05:00

I've been meaning to blog about this for awhile. Last month my cousin, Kenny, passed away after an incredible battle with cancer. He was a police officer with the Austin police force for 30 years. His funeral was unlike anything I've ever seen. First of all, I've never seen so many cops in one room. The funeral was the greatest showing of respect I've every seen. The weather was cold and rainy which seemed quite fitting.

I've been blown away by Kenny since his diagnosis. I've never seen someone face such difficult circumstances with such a positive attitude and will to live. He never stopped fighting even in the very end. If a fighting spirit alone could cure cancer, Kenny would have been cured the day after his diagnosis.

Here is a link to the news coverage of his funeral.
KVUE Story

2009-04-16T21:44:00.003-05:00

A few months ago, maybe even a year ago, I told you to check out Obediah Parker's version of Hey Ya. Well last night they played that song on Scrubs! That led me to believe that the producers of Scrubs are reading my blog. I always welcome new readers. :)

I have a little story for you. After church last night I was up in my office and received a text telling me there was a duck under my car. Of course I thought this was a joke. But as it turns out, a little ducky with a broken foot had found its way under my car! Whoa. It was so cute and scared. So, Tim (the other youth minister) called animal patrol, who were not working at 9:00 pm. So the dispatcher sent out a police officer to help us in our time of need. While we waited on the first responder, we noticed an owl, or hawk, or some other big predatory bird perched on a tree in the distance. Back to that in a moment. I expected the officer to put the duck in a cage and take him in for treatment. Instead he scooped him up in a blanket and carried him down to the creek at the edge of the church property. I was a little disappointed in his course of action, but what was I going to do- argue with the cop? This morning Tim and I were so proud of our courageous actions last night. We decided to go down to the creek and check on the ducky. All we found was a big pile of duck feathers. This forced us to believe that owl made a good dinner out of the duck last night. Nature can be so tragic.

Here's the poor little duck.

The duck was a little scared of me. I'm assuming this was because of my red eyes.

The police officer who led the duck to ultimate death.

2009-03-05T19:17:00.003-06:00

Lots of thoughts going on here... just follow along.

I recently drove through the state of Kentucky. It seems like a nice enough place. Here's the weird thing- apparently they have no idea what to do with the bodies of dead deer. So, their best answer is to simply leave them in the grassy median. Hey- it's winter time, at least they'll kind of blend in with the dead grass. Well, not really. I lost count after 20. We were only in the state for about an hour.

Last Saturday I had to get 3 van loads of teens back from Wichita in a snow storm. I doubt my blood pressure has ever been higher. I prayed the whole way home as I gripped the wheel with all my might. At one point I said, God if you get us home I'll give you the glory on my blog. So here it is people: The good Lord got us home safely last Saturday morning! He's pretty good at protecting me. We sure know it wasn't my driving abilities.

There is all this commotion about The Bachelor. Surprisingly, I've never watched the show, so I have no comment.

I wish those lovely people who cut hair would just admit they have no idea how to style curly hair. I'd rather leave with my hair wet than let them blow dry my head into a frizzy afro. (is that even how you spell that?) Today when the lady was trying to dry my hair, I finally had to just say, "ma'am will you please stop that, I'll just leave like this." I knew she couldn't fix the mess she was creating. I did give her a nice tip though, just in case she thought I was rude.

I have a girls retreat coming up soon. I'm on empty when it comes to ideas about what we should do. Any thoughts out there?

Today was an open windows day! The sun was shining and it was so wonderful. I hope it lasts a little while.

I had to face some rejection yesterday. I'm tired of putting myself out there. I'm also tired of being a "good friend." That's all have to say about that.

It's time for some Thursday night tv. Such a good way to end a long week. I'll finish with a new photo. My good pal Susan took this for our new website at church.

2009-01-31T21:43:00.001-06:00

I hate the phrase:
"Don't throw the baby out with the bath water."

People in my world say it all the time. Stop it!

2009-01-19T19:54:00.002-06:00

What is it about Oscar season that just makes you want to cry?... oh, it's the movies! My goal this year was to see all of the big Oscar films. Well apparently, to get anywhere in Hollywood you must commit suicide, molest an alter boy, read to an illiterate Nazi, hate people from Asia, and marry Leonardo DiCaprio. Why can't we just be sweet and nice and happy? Jeez America, let's get some therapy.

2008-12-30T18:06:00.001-06:00

Today was one of those days that you really feel like a minister.

2008-12-23T10:26:00.001-06:00

2008-12-13T21:02:00.002-06:00

So, I was updating my Facebook and realized that I haven't read any books lately that aren't youth ministry related. Well, I'm in the mood for reading- it must be the cold weather. Give me some recommendations. What are your favorite books? You know, the ones that you just can't put down. The ones you read in a day. And please don't say Twilight...

2008-12-12T09:34:00.002-06:00

Something else I am pondering...
This morning the weather person said that our high temp on Sunday would be 61 and our high on Monday would be 16. Is that even possible?

2008-12-11T14:19:00.003-06:00

So I have a pretty crazy task before me. I'm about to spend the next two months teaching a group of rowdy 7th and 8th graders how to study the bible. On the surface this many sound easy, but as I sit here preparing, I'm becoming more fearful, or confused, or overwhelmed, well I'm not sure exactly how I feel. Here's what I do know. I didn't learn how to study the bible until I went to grad school. I am confident that my exegetical material from those classes will be lost on these teens, I say sarcastically. In all honesty, that material was lost on me pretty regularly. Oh man. Wish me luck people.

Taking the Plunge

2008-12-06T11:15:00.002-06:00

Several months ago I declared 2009 would be "The Year of the Man." I have no idea why I even said it. But I think I'll take myself up on it. I've been doing some reading on the eHarmony website, and I'm thinking I'll give it a shot. What do I have to lose right? At least I'll have more to blog about. The truth is, since I finished grad school, I don't really know how to meet people my age. One friend said I should just go to some bars. Well, that's not the best image I want to pass along to my teens. :) Everyone keeps telling me there's this whole world of single people out there. I guess I just need a little help breaking into it. So, throughout 2009 feel free to stop by here for updates on the life of an online dater.

2008-11-30T21:15:00.003-06:00

So, I had a few problems today. Let me share.

1. I have this ear problem. Maybe an ear infection or a sinus problem. Or maybe just a build up of wax. Whatever it is, I can't hear out of my right ear and I am sick of it! I'm going to the doctor soon, so don't worry.
2. On my was home from church I hit a curb, hard. I tore up my tire and bent the rim. Great. AAA was there in 20 minutes though so I still made it home in time for a Sunday afternoon nap on this snowy winter day.
3. I got a hole in my jeans tonight during youth worship. It's a 2 inch rip right over my right butt check. Luckily, I'd already sat down when it happened. So the teens didn't see my colorful panties (I hope). Most days I think I need to just stand up in front of the teens and say- "your youth minister is the biggest dork of all time, don't expect her to ever be cool." Then I would never have to worry about being embarrassed. We would all just expect these things to happen.
4. I don't think the heat in my apartment is working and it's Sunday night so there's not much I can do about it right now. Luckily, I have way too many blankets in my apartment, so I'm toasty right now in my bed.

Tonight I led a worship time about how much God blesses our lives and how much we have to be thankful for. Ironic, eh?

2008-11-21T07:37:00.000-06:00

ummm, it's 16 degrees.

2008-11-11T22:14:00.002-06:00

I have a new friend. One of my bffs, Lynsey, labored for something crazy like 40 hours to bring a little cutie into the world. Welcome Anna Kate Wells. I'm so excited to meet you and I'm really glad you have red hair! I was pulling for them to name her Sue, but no one ever takes me up on that. What's the deal? Sue is a great name people! It rhymes with so many words... two, boo, do, who, eww, moo, poo... See, you can take it anywhere. But enough of this nonsense...

On to something much less important than Anna Kate. I'm talking about college football. With the recent success of the Texas Tech Red Raiders, my personal intake of college football, espn game day, and sports center has hit an all time high. Now this is a major problem. It goes against all I stand for. As soon as I moved out of the Mullican Male House of Sports I vowed to take my life in a different direction- a sports free zone if you will. And I've done a great job, with the exception of the summer olympics of course. So anyways, these past few weeks Lubbock has gone crazy and I've watched from afar wishing I was participating in the madness. So in an attempt to join the masses of my hometown, I'll do it: WRECK 'EM TECH! Don't ever expect that again on this journey of a blog.

2008-10-27T15:57:00.001-05:00

This is a shout out to my Romanian reader. I get a pretty consistent hit from somewhere in Romania, but I have no idea who I might be connected to over there. So, my Romanian friend, leave me a comment sometime. :)

I don't have much to blog about lately. I've been feeling somewhat uninspired these days. So, I'll give you a few thoughts on death- but not what you're probably thinking. As I said earlier, I love the fall. What a great time of year. But as I watch the leaves change and fall to the ground, I can't help but think about dying. These leaves, who have provided so much beauty and shade and photosynthesis are now meeting their end. They will be raked into monster trash bags that look like pumpkins and eventually end up in some dump or landfill. This death is necessary for the tree. And as a season ends, the tree is preparing itself for something new. For new life. New blooms, new beauty, new leaves, new shade. But this new life only comes through death. And we are reminded of this each October.

I have died to a few things in my life. At the end of my first semester in grad school my mentor asked me: "What have you died to this semester?" My answer was very obvious to me. That semester I had died to Lubbock and home. After two previous failed attempts to leave, I had finally moved away from my home and community and the safety it provided- not just physically, but emotionally too. I knew that I could be successful in a new place. Dying to my Lubbock/parents/Broadway/friends/LCU/home self gave me an opportunity for new life elsewhere. New opportunities, challenges, and joys. I'm thinking we are always dying to something. It is a Biblical idea after all.

The hard part about dying is that time between the falling leaves and the new blooms: the winter. The tree must endure a long hard cold season before it is ready to produce the new life. So, I feel as though I am in a fall stage of life right now. I am dying to something. I can feel it in my heart. And I'm bracing myself for the cold season ahead. But I know there is a beautiful spring in store full of new life and beauty.

2008-10-07T17:11:00.002-05:00

Fall, glorious fall. It has arrived. 70 degree days, leaves crunching under my feet, campfires, hayrides, and football games. My favorite season is here and I love it!

2008-09-28T17:17:00.001-05:00

Don't you just hate waiting... me too.

2008-09-23T15:16:00.003-05:00

Why do people put tennis balls on the legs of their walkers? I cannot figure it out. Wouldn't it make it more slippery? Or is that what they're going for? This world has so many unanswered questions!

Anyways, a little followup to my previous diary entry...
Thank you all so much for your kind words and thoughts in response to my struggles. As a minister, I think I've forgotten what it's like to be ministered to. Following my post, a friend of mine sent me message and said she wanted to meet with me about what I had written. Immediately, I assumed she must have some similar struggle and would like me to help her through it or minister to her in some way- which is something I'm always happy and honored to do. At our Starbucks meeting, I was pleasantly surprised when she simply wanted to listen to me and help me. She sat there and offered me exactly what I needed, a friend.
As far as the food stuff goes, I'm seeking out some help and I feel better about the whole situation. God is blessing me in some really wonderful ways right now and I am filled with deep gratitude and a desire to seek Him more.

About the awkward social interaction. Although some of you have asked for a detailed description of events, I just cannot offer it. The encounter involved the ex-husband of someone close to me and it would be very insensitive of me to make light of the situation in my usual silliness. Just know that you would have laughed at me and my ridiculous show of social awkwardness. I should have just run away.

Extreme Week

2008-09-21T17:20:00.002-05:00

In the past couple of days I've...
-Been to the biggest Starbucks I've ever seen.
-Experienced the most awkward social interaction of my life.
-Saw the biggest yorkie dog ever.
-And, heard Informer on the radio. (remember that song?!?)
Craziness, I tell you, craziness!

Two Things

2008-09-16T22:58:00.003-05:00

I might write a book some day called The Effects of the Camp High on the Spiritual Formation of Christian Teens. I can just imagine it flying of the shelves at Borders.

My favorite quote lately:
God is a Verb
-Buckminster Fuller

More on these things later.

Good Sue Hunting, take 2

2008-09-14T22:59:00.012-05:00

Well, I'm back. My trip to Boston was wonderful. I didn't want to take a vacation alone because I thought I'd get a little lonely, so my parents and I made the trek together. We had such a good time. I love Boston- maybe I'll move there someday! Here are some photos for your viewing pleasure.

Pops and I sitting right outside Boston Commons. This was right before I fed the birds the peanut butter crackers in my backpack- a most enjoyable experience.

An old cemetery by Harvard. I love how life and death are portrayed in this picture.

Here is Longfellow's home. I loved all the houses on this street.

The Revere pew in the Old North Church.

Street performers at Quincy Market. They were great.

The Holocaust Memorial.

One of six towers at the Holocaust Memorial. Each tower represented one of the major camps. This was a very sober moment.

The New England School of Law- the first law school to admit women (so says our trolley tour guide who was totally crazy and almost killed us multiple times!)

The first U.S. Post Office

Sitting at Boston Harbor with a bag of tea. (Incidentally, the couple behind me were getting engaged at this moment. My dad didn't tell me this was going on though. I guess he thought I'd freak out and squeal or something. He was probably right.)

Screw your tea tax! I WILL throw this tea in the harbor.

We happened to walk upon a line of people waiting to be sworn in as American citizens. This was a highlight of the trip for my dad. It was a pretty moving sight.

Here we are on a boat tour with the skyline behind us. We were the only people on the tour so we received a lot of personal attention from the guide.

JFK lived here as he was campaigning for president...or senator (I can't remember)

Walking the Freedom Trail. I made sure to get my feet in the picture since we were walking the trail.

After we downed a few at Cheers. Not really.

This trip hit me at the perfect moment. It was exactly what I needed. I had a lot of time to think and read, and simply listen to my iPod. I've returned feeling renewed.

Trip Soundtrack:
So Are You to Me by Eastmountainsouth
North Dakota by Lyle Lovett
Somewhere Only We Know by Keane
The One Who Knows by Dar Williams with Allison Krause
Down in the Valley sung by The Choral Project
Pills by The Parishers with Sarah McLachlan
I Try sung by Ben Taylor
Plus lots of Amos Lee, Sigur Ros, and Alanis Morissette

Good Sue Hunting: vacation update.

2008-09-11T20:23:00.002-05:00

(If you don't know, I'm on vacation in Boston right now)

Boston is the bomb. And I never use that phrase.

Well, blogger isn't letting me upload my pictures so this post is postponed. (postponed- get it!?)

Anyways, tomorrow I'm off to see the witches in Salem. I think I'll wear all black.

More to come...

The Diary of a Fat Woman

2008-09-05T22:55:00.002-05:00

...another entry.

If I was an alcoholic, I’d say I’ve fallen off the wagon. But I’m not addicted to alcohol, I’m addicted to food. So, I don’t know what to call this place I’ve found myself. Something happened. I’m not sure when it happened. Like most things, it came on gradually and quietly. About the time I’d hit the 100lb. mark is when it started, I guess. I went out for a walk tonight and it all really hit me. This was the first walk in months.

Here’s the journey. 300 pounds was my rock bottom which I hit around the fall of ’06. Gastric bypass is a fat person’s trip to rehab in the desert to dry out and learn how to live again before they rejoin society. Unfortunately, during the rehab process you know that even though this truly is the best option for you and things are going perfectly, it might not last forever. There will be a day when you stop fighting for it, when it doesn’t seem worth it anymore. One strike against me was that I had the surgery in a city where I didn’t live, which meant that visits of accountability with my doctor required a trip to Lubbock. I didn’t have the weekly support groups he offered. Once I went back to school I felt very far from help. This meant that I was on my own. Certainly I could have found an avenue of support where I was and I really intended to, but I didn’t. Why did I even need that? I was doing so great on my own. Walking two miles a day. Eating right. Lots of water and vitamins. Plus I had great support from family and friends. But at the end of the day none of these people knew what I was actually going through. Being addicted to food is so humiliating and demeaning. You hate the body you must live in each day. You want to stay home everyday so no one will see you. And you sure don’t want anyone to know you are struggling, because somehow they’ve managed to learn to say no to excessive sugar and carbs and to stop eating when they’re full. Why can’t I do the same?

So, fast forward a bit to strike number two- becoming a youth minister. While youth ministry fills my life with immeasurable blessings, it does bring about certain challenges to the food addict. My life consists of going from meal to meal. I mean constant eating out- every meal. Pizza, hot dogs, cookies, Mexican food, crap, crap, crap. Not to mention very little time for exercise, personal development, emotional health, peer relationships, Sabbath or prayer. Tack on an unbelievable amount of stress to the equation and you start to see the picture.

So, tonight I find myself in this place with no name- this fallen off the wagon place. The compliments about how nice I look or how much weight I’ve lost actually sting as I think about the lifestyle I’ve slipped back into. I cringe when someone mentions my weight or the way I look. There’s so much fear here in this place. Have I done permanent damage to my body? Will I ever get back on the wagon? Will it always be this hard? There’s so much regret for the time lost and this great opportunity I’ve adulterated. And so much shame. I feel as though I’ve let so many people down. I think back to the rehab experience of the surgery. All the prayers given on my behalf. The indescribable support from those who love me and even from those who barely know me. And the roller coaster I put my parents on as they’ve had to witness their only daughter endure such a war. A war I created. All of that effort from others in an attempt to help me succeed- and where am I now: back on the losing end of this fight.

I can’t end this post with a declaration that tomorrow will be the first day of the rest of my life, because I don’t know if it will be. I only know how I feel tonight. Tonight I’m dying to be that other person again. Experiencing the confidence, personal victory, and mental clarity that exercise brings. Finding the strength to make the desired choices about the foods that enter my body. And as a person of faith, if my body truly is a temple of the Lord, what does this lifestyle say about the value I have placed on such a dwelling place?

Perhaps this post is far too personal for a simple blog typically devoted the joys offered by current tv shows. But I have chosen to be a person who can be vulnerable in the presence of others. Please respect my vulnerability here.

2008-08-28T21:47:00.002-05:00

Anybody wanna talk politics? So, do you think a presidential candidate can really do everything they say they will in their nomination acceptance speech?

2008-08-26T21:06:00.002-05:00

Back in April I decided I'd like to marry Donald Miller. More confirmation of that fact came last night at the Democratic National Convention.

2008-08-18T21:51:00.004-05:00

Has anyone seen that freecreditreport.com commercial where the guy is riding on the bike singing...
F to the R to the E to the E to the C to the R to the E-D-I-T...
Hahahah. That is my favorite commercial lately. It cracks me up. I just watched it four times in a row thanks to dvr. That's pretty sad, I know.

Okay, so how much have I loved the Olympics! That Michael Phelps- he's so cute. I'd definitely marry him. And those girl gymnasts are just great. I really wanted Shawn Johnson to take the gold last night. She deserves one. I just love how sweet she is. Or at least how sweet she is on camera. And, does anyone believe the Chinese gymnasts are 16? They look about 12. What a scandal.

Well, all of our teens are back in school now and we've been singing a little song in the office- "It's the most wonderful time of the year..." I don't really mean that. I really miss them when they go back to school. But I am so excited about this school year. There is so much excitement right now. On Sunday morning we even ran out of chairs!

So the biggest news of all: I have a new niece! Stephen and Julie had their second little girl on Sunday afternoon. Her name is Kamryn Paige and she has lots of hair- just like her favorite aunt!

2008-08-14T15:38:00.002-05:00

I love to live in a place where the afternoon temp is 70 degrees in August! I'm actually cold. I'm going to go find a sweatshirt.

2008-07-26T18:07:00.003-05:00

Whoa, the whole summer has gone by. I can't believe it. I have so many things to write about.

The Weather.
Our weather this summer has been awesome. We've only had a few very hot days. And the humidity hasn't been that bad. I guess that's a stupid thing to start with, but it has been such a blessing.

Mission Trips.
Our mission trips this summer were great. They were probably the toughest thing I've had to plan so far and I was super stressed, but I must say watching my kids serve God with big smiles on their faces makes this job worth it.

Losing Jane.
My friend Jane passed away at the end of June after a very hard and fast battle with cancer. She was diagnosed around spring break of this year. I still can't believe how quickly she went. In her final weeks, her main concern was still for others. She wanted us to pray that no one would lose their faith because of her death. There are very few people I know who lived for others the way Jane did. Her first words to me were: "I've been praying for you to come to Overland Park." Her last words to me in the hospice house were: "You look so pretty." Her first words, her last words, and all the words in between were constant encouragement. I am a better person for knowing her.

Tim's Arrival.
I finally have help! Thank the Lord! Tim Hall and his family arrived this summer to join our youth ministry team. Life is so much better on a team rather than alone and I am so thankful for all he has brought to the table so far. We get along very well and I am pumped up about the future of this ministry (and the present!).

Camp.
I've been home from camp for a week now, and I'm still not completely recovered. We had such a great week this year. I love watching the teens worship God and love each other. Sometimes I wish we could just live at camp. I do hate that shower house though.

Mullicans Unite.
Our annual Mullican family reunion is next weekend and I'm really excited. I love the Texas hill country. And I am pumped for a weekend on the river. I think the heat may kill me though.

Internet Woes.
For the last year I've just been using a wireless signal from a neighbor. They finally locked the signal this month. This is the main reason for my blog delinquency. I've been looking for a cheap provider out there and can't come up with much. Any suggestions?

There's this lady...

2008-06-05T22:29:00.002-05:00

My apartment complex has three small lakes that are home to many ducks. This may be my favorite part of living here. Sometimes when I go down to check the mail I see this lady feeding the ducks. It's really cute, but she does it right in the middle of the parking lot. I don't know about you, but I would prefer to feed the ducks on the grass- where cars don't live. Anyways, today I went down to get the huge stack of bills out of my mailbox and there was the duck lady. She was feeding them in the parking lot and creating a traffic jam in the process. Once she realized what she was doing she looked down at the ducks and actually said the words: "Come on kids, let's get out of the way." I was so taken back I almost tripped on the sidewalk.

Meanwhile, things are pretty crazy right now. This evening I returned from our middle school mission trip. In a week I leave for the high school trip. My interns have arrived, my co-minister is finally here, and we're in the middle of an office remodel. But all of those things are secondary. I have thirteen year old twin boys who are losing their mother to a horrible fight with cancer. Her name is Jane, and she is all I can think about. This is hard.

Sweet Endings

2008-05-31T10:28:00.004-05:00

I didn't know I was the daughter of celebrities. Last weekend I flew down to the big Lub for my parent's retirement celebration. Together, they have served the Lubbock Independent School District for 77 years. The festivities began Thursday afternoon with the LISD reception. It was really nice. There were so many people there. They even rented a baby grand player piano just for the occasion. Here's a picture of the fam, minus Dave who had school that day. We were surprisingly color coordinated.

Friday night we celebrated with a BBQ at the house and 30 of mom and dad's closest friends. It was such a sweet moment to honor the lives of two people with incredible work ethic, loyalty, and integrity.

So, last night mom called to tell me that one of the news stations had heard about their double retirement and ran a story on them! How exciting is that? I've been searching online to find the video clip, but I can't find it. Anyways, I'm so proud of them for everything they have done and so excited for what's to come (including more trips to Kansas!)

2008-05-15T23:08:00.004-05:00

Awww, 26. Someone told me I'm now in my late 20s. Yeah, you suck.

So here's the deal. In some areas of life I've far exceeded my expectations for 26. I never expected to be a full time youth minister in such a large church by this point. In fact, for a while I thought that would never happen. I consider my career to be a huge accomplishment, like running a marathon or curing cancer- ok not quite.

So, here's the missing piece of 26. Right now I'm sitting on my bed writing this completely alone. Honestly, there was never a moment in my life when I thought I would graduate from college without a husband. Silly I know, but all of my closest friends managed it. So, with birthdays, as the number increases so does the alone-ness- not necessarily loneliness, but just an increased sense of alone. It's just me, and even the best parents in the world, a million messages from my teens, and several free meals from friends just can't quite fill the gap. So as I stare at 26, I'm wishing someone was standing by my side looking at it with me.

2008-05-13T22:55:00.003-05:00

Check out this cover of Hey-Ya. It's awesome.

Anyways, the last few weeks I've had the car bug. Well, not so much the car bug- but the gas prices for a SUV are eating my lunch bug. I actually love my car very much, I just hate the money it takes to run it and I'm really getting into the green movement.

So, with all that said, I have fallen in love with the prius. What a cool car! I even went to the Toyota dealership and was wooed by some man named John for about an hour and a half. The prius is the coolest car ever. You start it by simply pushing a button! This is the car of the future. As I drove it I couldn't stop watching the little screen that told me I was getting 99.9 miles to the gallon as I was breaking. If I got one I could easily get into a wreck just by watching that screen. So, I'm totally sold on the hybrid.

But then John brought me my monthly payment options and he totally burst my bubble. My new car payment would be much higher than my gas savings. So, back to reality. My car of the future will simply have to stay there.

2008-05-12T22:10:00.001-05:00

Does anyone out there drive a prius?

2008-05-02T22:50:00.002-05:00

I'm okay. A few of you have called to check on me. Yes, there were major storms and tornadoes that blew through last here last night. I was sitting on my deck reading a book watching the storm roll in. Then I heard the sirens and started checking the weather. All of the tornadoes were pretty far from my house, but we did get about 2 inches of rain here- so says the meteorologist.

Crazy tornado weather is nothing new for me. In west Texas you live in a tornado warning from mid-March through May. Here's something strange though. The worst storms always happen on Thursday nights. This is not scientific research, only personal observation mind you. Here's what I know, if there are good shows on TV to be watched, they will be interrupted by a severe weather alert. And since Thursdays are the best night for TV, that's when the storms roll in. I think weather people bank on it.

2008-04-30T21:40:00.002-05:00

I'm a pistol.

2008-04-26T17:04:00.002-05:00

Spring has sprung and it is beautiful! I love seasons. I have put away my boots, sweaters and coat and I went out and bought some spring clothes today. I'm also going to plant some flowers outside on my deck.

Tomorrow I'm leaving town again. I'm headed to Atlanta with our children's minister. In fact, every minister at OP will be out of town next week. I think that's funny. One of my youth moms said, "we should cancel church!" I'm sure this will be the week when there is a major crisis and a bunch of funerals. When I worked in Abilene, the preacher there would do a couple of funerals a week. One week, he had to do four, including the funeral of a former ACU first lady. I always felt sorry for him. I don't know how he ever left town. Anyways... I'm excited about my trip, but my apartment is feeling a little neglected with all of my travels. It's a disaster.

So, back to the spring discussion. When it hits about 70 degrees I always pull out the capri
pants. They are such a nice alternative to shorts. However, Stacy and Clinton have said that capris are atrocious and make you look stumpy. Now, I always agree with their opinions, but I just don't think I can say goodbye to the capris. What do you think out there?

2008-04-22T23:00:00.000-05:00

Here you go people.

Youth Minister of the Year.

2008-04-21T17:09:00.001-05:00

Well the Awkward Retreat is over and it was sufficiently awkward, but totally great.

2008-04-14T20:37:00.002-05:00

How cool is my new design!?!!? A huge shout out to Mel for her awesome work! I think it is so pretty, and it looks just like me. I keep opening up this page just to look at it.

This week is busy. It's a retreat week. This weekend is our huge Spring Retreat. It is actually a purity retreat. Oh yes, lots of sex talk. We're calling it the awkward retreat. Honestly, I'm really excited about it. We're going to tie-dye t-shirts. And we're having an awkward prom. A room full of ugly thrift store outfits and crate paper decorations. It's going to rock.

If you love David Crowder...

2008-04-12T21:33:00.001-05:00

2008-03-31T22:32:00.002-05:00

Wow, everyone has these cute new designs on their blogs. How did you guys do this? I tried something new, but I like yours better. Help me people.

Well, life is crazy. Everyday I ask myself, is this how ministry is everywhere, or just here? divorce, cancer, crisis, psychosis, sex, drugs, and rock and roll. Did I mention that was just today? I just keep thinking, I am so not equipped to handle this. So, every night I lay in my bed and remind myself- this is God's work, not mine. God is equipped and in control, just surrender. I do think I'm due for a little trip though. Next week I'll head to Chicago for the Willow Creek Youth Conference. I'm totally pumped. The day I leave, I just may change my facebook status to: Susan is leaving town, don't call. :)

Well, no comments about the 90210 spin-off. I'm disappointed in you people. Seriously.

Pop Culture Update

2008-03-18T22:18:00.002-05:00

First, and most importantly, there are talks going on about a 90210 spin off. Yes people, a continuation of the story. What happened with Kelly and Dylan. Are David and Donna still married. What about Brandon. Truthfully, I always wanted Brandon to end up with Kelly. Do you think Steve had any more kids? Whoa, so much to catch up on.

Now, some of you want to know about High School Confidential. If you don't know what I'm talking about, just skip this paragraph. Yes, I do have several kids who go to Blue Valley North West. Some of my girls used to play on the soccer team and I think I may have seen one of them on Monday's episode. I don't know any of the 12 girls they followed around, but it is so cool that all of this took place down the street from my house. I'll let you know if I see any more of my kids on there.

On to the big screen. The other night I went to see The Other Boleyn Girl. It was really good. The story of Anne Boleyn and King Henry played a major role in the history of the church. As I watched the movie, I missed grad school just a little bit. Anyways, the plot is nuts and the whole time you'll be going, what! no way!

2008-03-12T13:55:00.002-05:00

Okay, I'm better now, I know some of you were concerned. Today is a marvelous day. It finally feels like spring. The sun is shining and the sky is blue. I'm sure that means it will snow tomorrow. I want to recommend something to you. Over the holidays I was able to read such a great book. I just happened to see it at Barnes and Noble and mentioned it, so Santa put it in my stocking. It's called Same Kind of Different as Me.

This book really got under my skin. I read it in about a 24 hour period. I don't think I've ever been quite so impacted by a book. I still think about it a lot and hope it will continue to impact my life, the way I think about things, and the way I love people. So there you go. Get a copy and read it people.

2008-03-07T19:29:00.003-06:00

Is my blog self dying?

Right now I'm hiding in my office. I have some teens up at the building and I'm scared of them. Sometimes I get like this. After a long day, I'm tired, the teens are too hyper, wheelchairs are being pushed down the stairs, the building is getting messy, and there's a funeral tomorrow. I know if I go out there I'll just yell at them. They know I'm in a bad mood, I might as well just embrace it. They don't realize that when something bad happens in the building, the teens are always blamed, as they probably should be. Well, people can't take that blame out on 150 kids, so they take it out on the minister. How am I supposed to control other people's kids who drink way too much Dr. Pepper and are cooped up inside all day and just need to explode once in a while. So anyways, I'm hiding. What a good time to update the blog.

2008-01-06T22:30:00.000-06:00

I'm continually surprised by God's work in my life. I wonder why. I guess grad school jaded me quite a bit. I've lived for a while now really doubting God's work in the everyday seemingly mundane details of life. How can Almighty God really be present in those minor details? Doesn't God have better things to do, better places to work and be present? Isn't it enough that God sent a Savior to this earth for me and the rest of creation? With all of the pain, injustice, sin, tears, fallen-ness ... this world has to offer, does God really care about a little ole youth ministry in eastern Kansas, USA enough to 'work out' the details, to consistently be present, and to continually bless? I don't know exactly where I land on all of this, but here's what I do know: the blessing aren't stopping. The parent's meetings, retreats, conversations, and worship times keep 'working out' and my only explanation is that God must be involved, because I know it sure isn't anything I'm doing.

2008-01-04T21:34:00.000-06:00

The best part of my holiday:

2007-12-27T21:55:00.000-06:00

I just got to Lubbock and it's already time to leave. I'm not ready to go back.

2007-12-24T01:20:00.001-06:00

closure.

2007-12-22T21:54:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow I will see Mr. C for the first time in 2.5 years. Oh the butterflies.

2007-12-16T22:54:00.000-06:00

What is it about dreams that is so freaky. Last night I dreamed about my 'family.' In this dream was my mom and two little sisters. Now, I don't have any sisters, so their entire existence was completely fictional. But my mom was a spot on match. Everything was exactly realistic from her voice and hair cut to her snowman pajamas. That's so weird. And I woke up not knowing where I was. I was so freaked out by the experience that I couldn't fall back asleep. I was also scared. I was sure someone was in my apartment.

When I was a little girl, I would pray the same little prayer every night. I always prayed that our house wouldn't be broken into and that I wouldn't have a bad dream. I may repeat that prayer again tonight before I fall asleep.

I'm a little embarrassed by this post. Clearly I need some deep therapy.

2007-12-14T13:45:00.000-06:00

Here's some pictures of the ice taken from my balcony. I think they are beautiful.

One Year

2007-12-12T23:04:00.000-06:00

At this moment last year I was coming out of recovery. I can't believe it's been a whole year since my surgery. In many ways I feel like this battle will never end, I will always be fighting it. Every pound is a struggle. But I think the struggle is worth it. This surgery has given me a new opportunity to enjoy life. I wouldn't say it's given me a new life- just a new way to live it. So, this is me being completely vulnerable- here is me on December 12, 2006:

And, here is me on December 12, 2007:

I feel I should end this post with a thank you. I entered this surgery and new stage in my life with an enormous amount of support and love from all of you. I could literally feel your prayers as I recovered last year. So, although the words don't feel adequate enough, thank you.

2007-12-11T21:19:00.000-06:00

Well I survived. At this time last night I was waiting for the biggest, most dangerous ice storm of all time. The weather people were freaking out. Schools were canceled. And two youth parents called to warn me I might lose power so I should come to their house because they have a generator. (very sweet by the way) So today I'm kind of thinking- what's the big deal?? Yeah, there's some ice on the trees but luckily I missed the major catastrophe causing storm. I don't want to live in fear all season. I hate how the forecasters create these huge emergencies. Yesterday, our children's minister brought a suitcase of clothes to work in case she was to get stuck at the building because the news had scared her. That makes me laugh a little. Our male ministers are from the north and us girls are from Texas- so, the boys sit around really calm about the weather while us girls are freaking out and climbing up the walls. Oh Kansas.

Yesterday I got to go spend a HUGE amount of money. Don't worry mom, it wasn't out of my own checking account. Tomorrow night me and the teens are heading out to take Christmas to a foster facility. I'm so excited. We're having a party with a special appearance by the big man himself (Santa, not God). So, yesterday I got to go out and buy board games, playing cards, dominoes, art supplies....... It was just wonderful. I was pulling two overflowing carts around Walmart trying to weave in and out of the crowd. I was quite the spectacle and I kept hitting the back of my heels with the back cart. That hurt, but I know for a fact that I've never had that much fun shopping in my life!

2007-12-08T22:08:00.001-06:00

19 degrees. Whoo-hoo. Anyways, I've taken a journey this weekend. A journey down memory lane. When I moved into my apartment, I found lots of old photos and albums. So, last night I finally got them out and looked through them. I must say, I've lived in this nostalgic state all day. My teen years, at least the later ones, were just awesome. I had such good friends and so much fun. My life is really great now, and I wouldn't ask for anything more. But, there is something really special about those years, kind of like the best years of your life...

So, join me in my journey. I put all of these on facebook, but I know many of you aren't on facebook so I decided to put them here as well. Here's the youth group section. This is a picture of me and my youth minister Jack Whiddon at camp in Estes Park, CO. My version of heaven is that camp in those mountains.
Okay, this one is just funny to me. Our youth group had such hotties! And they loved taking off their shirts for the camera. I don't even remember this, so I must have stolen the picture from someone for the eye candy.

These two are by far the two cutest girls I know. Lauren Griffin and Sara Fannin, I just love you two.

This is me and Josh something. He was by far the hottest intern of all time and I had the biggest crush on him that lasted much longer than just the summer he was around. I know I was not alone.

Here's me and Meghan Fleming. I just loved her. What ever happened to her? I really like this picture mostly because I am so skinny and cute in it. Why was I single?

Ryan Crumpler and I. He was my best friend. I haven't had that good of a friend (who is also male) since him. I guess it's because all of the guys I know now are married to my girl friends.

This one is so funny too. This was the day my dress arrived for my brother's wedding. I was 14! (Is there anything better than braces?) So, Maddie Culwell came over after church to see it. We were all so excited about Stephen's wedding. That dress is really strange looking now, over ten years later. It was really pretty then though.

Here's a group shot from camp. I think my favorite thing about it is Emily Berry and Ryan Blankenship (yellow t-shirt and the boy). They were so sweet to me. They were older than me but never treated me like I was younger. Looking back, they took really good care of me. Again, I wonder what ever happened to them.

Best of friends. I have so many of these pictures. I could make a whole album of pictures of me, Annie, Allison, and Lynsey. What I love about this picture of the four of us is that we are still great friends and get together as often as we can, which sadly isn't very often. I love these ladies dearly.

And lastly, here a picture of my brother with Lauren Culwell and Smash. I really can't believe how tan David is, and how short his hair is. The reality was that just about ever girl in the youth group was totally in love with Dave- which made my life a little difficult at times. And I'm not talking about a little crush- I mean totally in love with him. It's funny because he never dated any of them. Playing hard to get I guess. I also love that face he's making. He still makes it.

And here's a few from High School. This one was from a choir trip to Orlando. We went to this weird thing called Arabian Nights. It was supposed to be like Medieval Times, but it really sucked. I liked the picture though.
This was from Twirp week. We took the boys out to laser tag and a steak dinner, I think-if I'm remembering correctly. I do remember having tons of fun that night.

I was the proud recipient of the Spirit Award each year I was in choir. I think this award was for those faithful choir members who didn't necessarily have the greatest voices, but did have the greatest attitudes. I was always really excited to get the award. I wonder what ever happened to those plaques.

Here's me and my super cute date to the choir banquet, Dustin. As you can tell, most of my life took place around choir events.

Whitney, Priscilla, Me, and Heather. We had so much fun together. I have a bunch of these pictures too. Sadly, I never see them any more.

Here's me and Whitney. We were a lot alike and laughed a lot. This was after a choir concert on my 18th birthday. I love this picture.

I guess it's fitting to end with a graduation picture. Here's me and Cullen (Mr. C for you devoted readers out there). I remember graduation day being a little more sad than exciting.

I hope you've enjoyed this journey. I know I have.

2007-12-06T23:26:00.000-06:00

There was this time when I worked with teenagers and they were never mad at me. Those were the days.

In other news, it snowed today. And it was delightful.

2007-12-05T10:17:00.000-06:00

We've already reached our high today: 31 degrees.

2007-12-03T22:06:00.000-06:00

My new favorite store is: Gordmans.

It is super. It has a TJMaxx feel, but it's much bigger and the products are higher quality. But the prices are still super low!! They're even open til 11 throughout the holidays. How great is that. Well, great for me, not so great for the employees. Hop into your local Gordmans today!

2007-11-29T18:04:00.000-06:00

Well, I returned from my Thanksgiving Texas trek to a whole new season. The cold weather has arrived, and I'm freezing. All of my winter clothes were way too big, so I gave them away last spring and now I don't have many things to keep me warm. My first winter purchase was a coat. This coat actually:

Pretty cute huh. Target baby.

My Thanksgiving was wonderful! I went down to San Antonio to meet up with the rest of my family. I was in charge of the sweet potatoes which totally stressed me out. I was very concerned that I would mess them up, and you know people can't help but judge you when you make bad food. So the pressure was on. I guess they turned out okay. On Friday we went to Fredricksburg to look around and celebrate my brother's birthday. I loved all the little shops, but the place was packed. And the weird thing was that a lot of people were walking around with their dogs. Like dogs want to go shopping. Anyways, I was really sad to come home on Saturday, but I guess all good things must come to an end.

So, here's a funny story that would only happen to a minister. Every week I work really hard to find enough stuff to put in our weekly bulletin. I never have enough stuff to fill up our pages. So, the week after I got back from the youth conference, I put the picture of me and David Crowder in the youth pages. I thought the kids would get a kick out of it. Above the picture were the words Sue & David Crowder. Well, since that Sunday I've had at least 20 people ask me if I had gotten married. Seriously. I also have had several people tell me that other people had asked them if I'd gotten married. Our preacher thought he was a homeless man. So, I guess I'm the only person in Kansas who knows who David Crowder is. Also, no more pictures of myself in the bulletin.

2007-11-10T21:08:00.001-06:00

It's coming... :)

2007-11-05T18:07:00.001-06:00

I love David Crowder. Maybe you didn't catch that. I LOVE David Crowder. So, this weekend as I traveled to St. Louis for the Youth Specialties conference, I was most excited that the David Crowder Band would be leading worship. So here's the story. I hurried to get the best seat I could. Here's my view:

After the session I knew I'd be able to find him somewhere. I went over to this little side curtain area, in true stalker form, and there he was!!!! Score big daddy. When he got around to shaking my hand I started freaking out a bit, which I think freaked him out a little too. I had on my David Crowder Band shirt for the occasion and didn't have any of my cds, so I asked him to sign my t-shirt. I was thinking upper front shoulder area, but as I pointed to it I realized that was really close to the boob area. So then I said, 'oh I don't want to make you uncomfortable, where do you want to sign?' And he said, 'we've moved well past the point of uncomfortable.' Yes, I'm a total stalker freak show. So, here is the picture of us finding an 'appropriate' spot for signage:

Here he is actually signing the shirt:

And here's the last picture of us. It's a nice one, huh. At the end of the experience I apologized to the rest of the people standing around for the spectacle I'd made of myself. And Crowder said thanks for my enthusiasm and excitement about his music. All in all, it was the perfect moment.

It smells like fall

2007-10-30T23:43:00.000-05:00

So, this is my first real fall. West Texas falls leave something to be desired. I'm loving watching the leaves change and the weather has been awesome. I leave the windows open all the time. I'm really trying to embrace the whole season. So, I've been doing fall things with the teens. My favorite has to be camp fires. It seems like as soon as I get the smell of camp fire out of my clothes, I go to another one. This morning when I was getting ready I could still smell camp fire, and it's been several days and several showers. Anyways, here's a few fall pictures.

This is a group shot from the Middle School Retreat. We had so much fun and I had my first paint ball experience. Honestly, what's the big deal about paint ball? I guess it's sort of fun, but come on- what's with all the hype? There are actual paint ball guns that cost 2000 dollars!! Why?

Alright, here's a picture my sister in law sent to me of my niece Kaelan. They were at a pumpkin patch. This is my favorite picture because she looks like she's about to go head first down the slide. I'm really missing her!

And here's one from a girls night out we had on Saturday. We had such a good time. I decorated my pumpkin as a little Sue. I even gave her black curly ribbon hair. We cooked hot dogs and s'mores over the fire and used actual sticks, not hangers. It was awesome. We even went on a hayride, but unfortunately the tractor hit a hole or something and lost a tire. So we had to walk back in the dark. But it was fun while it lasted. We finished the night just singing around the fire. I really do have the best job ever.

no, I didn't die

2007-10-14T22:43:00.000-05:00

So, every night I get home and think- I need to update my blog. There's just so much to do and so little time.

As thankful as I am for my education, there's just so much they didn't teach me. For instance, one day I had just gotten settled in my pew and was trying to focus on worship and God and all that churchy stuff when one of my high school boys came and found me and said- "Sue we need you, it's an emergency." Of course I'm thinking, someone is hurt or dying or about to be arrested. So, I get down to the basement and find two of my high school girls. They were in great distress and very happy to see me- someone who could help. These are the moments when you truly feel like you're making a difference. The kids need you and that feels great. Then I was taken back down to reality when the girls told me what was going on. They had found a stray cat behind the building. Yes, all of this commotion about a cat. I stood there for a moment, and finally said, "Well... what are you wanting me to do?" Apparently, there was a person who was tired of owning their cat, so they left the cat, carrier, and a sack of food behind the church building. That's so weird. Anyways, as much as I wanted to tell the girls to just let the cat go, (it is just a cat for goodness sake!) I found an open shelter, got a police officer involved, and eventually found a farm for the cat live out the rest of its days. Just call me youth minister of the year. Perhaps I should minister exclusively to cats. That would be much easier.

A quick update

2007-09-03T20:48:00.000-05:00

I've officially started working at OP.
I'm officially moved into my apartment.
I've officially lost 92 pounds!

2007-08-23T23:22:00.001-05:00

long awaited

2007-08-15T23:15:00.000-05:00

I've started this post several times. I don't really have anything to say, I've just been wanting to update and haven't really had a few uninterrupted moments in front of the computer. I am currently in Lubbock resting for a few days before I officially begin at OP on the 26th. Things are hopping in the big Lub. The Western Little League All Stars are headed to the world series. Oh Western Little League. Let me tell you how many hours I've spent at the Western League fields. The Saturday after I was born was my first appearance. My oldest brother Stephen had a tee-ball game, and a BRAND NEW baby was not enough of an excuse for my mom to miss that game. I'm glad I didn't get some kind of disease. Aren't you supposed to keep your new baby home for a couple of weeks. I'd be interested to know if they also went to church the next morning, or was the baseball diamond the only god worshiped that weekend? My birthday was in May, which was bad because every night was devoted to a game for one of the brothers. In first grade my mom creatively threw my birthday party at the baseball park during a game. Two birds with one stone I guess. 10 little first grade girls running around trying to have a good time at the ball park. I don't remember complaining about it then or even thinking it was weird. So, I'll complain now- 20 years later. That IS weird! Seriously, were thirty games a season not enough to take one night off for your daughter's birthday?? Okay, so I'm not really that bitter. Mom and Dad, please don't feel guilty as you read this. I've just been thinking for the last couple of days about what a huge effect my brother's sports had on our family. If the coach that season was bad, so was the mood of my family. A bad pitching season was devastating. Weddings, graduations, church camps and family vacations were all dependent on the baseball season, the possible playoffs, and perhaps the all stars games following the regular season. And all for what? I'm sure Stephen would still be working for Edward Jones with or without the baseball career of his youth. And I know David would have still met and married Hailey even if he hadn't made every one of those practices. I'm sure the commitment to sports offered my brothers valuable lessons about a good work ethic and honoring your commitments. And yes, I learned the importance of showing up for the people you love. But still, I'm just irritated when I think about it. Why is that?

By the way, as I began typing about Western Little League tonight I thought this post would be nostalgic, not whiny and bitter. I guess I've tapped into some deep childhood pain or something that I'll hash out with a therapist one of these days.

It's official

2007-08-01T23:00:00.000-05:00

I am now a real youth minister with a real job and a permanent resident of Kansas City!! Whoo-hoo! I can't believe it, but all of the pieces have finally come together. After years of prayer, preparation, and a big step of faith, God has blessed me with my dream job. I really couldn't ask for a better situation to begin full time ministry. The news was announced tonight at church and I was showered with so much love. I am just so thankful and blessed. God is good my friends, God is good.

2007-07-23T22:57:00.001-05:00

Back home, camp was awesome. Time to leave again.

2007-07-14T23:41:00.000-05:00

It's that time of year. The sun is shining. People are getting tan on their vacations. And I'm running around to every craft store, hard ware store, and Dollar Tree in town buying candles, crayons, 200 hundred red bricks, 80 clothes pins, and a million little mosaic tiles. It's camp time baby and I'm already tired. Tomorrow morning I'm headed to central Missouri with my kids to try to lead them a little closer to God. Last year our hottest day was 106 degrees, so I'm a little nervous about the heat. But other than that I think we're in for a great week. Our senior minister is going with us and I'm pumped. Growing up, our preacher always went to camp with us and we loved it. I'm excited for the kids to see him out of the pulpit. Anyways, I just love camp.

Bye.

2007-07-05T22:58:00.000-05:00

Well, I talked to him last weekend. I was missing him and decided to call. I've always loved our phone calls. We can be so honest and open, and I love to hear about his life. For years now I have longed for these phone calls, always hoping that he was thinking about me too. This call was different though. Yes, he's in a good place and I'm in a good place, and of course I was happy to hear his voice. The conversation was nice but it wasn't the same. Maybe he's changed, or I've changed, or probably both. For the first time, when I hung up the phone I had no desire to ever talk to him again. After loving him for so long, I just don't want to anymore-and I'm not sad about that. I'm not happy about it either, I just am. This is my reality- realizing the finality and accepting it. I just don't want you anymore.

2007-06-30T11:37:00.001-05:00

I forgot to mention this. After we finished our work in New Orleans, we headed over to Galveston for a day of rest and relaxation. As we were walking down the side walk, we looked over and saw this:

So, technically this isn't a real tornado, it's a water spout. I have no idea what that is, but it looks like a tornado to me. In all of my years living in West Texas spring time daily tornado warnings, I've never actually seen one- so I was pumped. I kept thinking to myself, am I really seeing this??

In other news, last night I watched The Lakehouse. I guess it wasn't too bad. Any thoughts??

2007-06-28T21:49:00.000-05:00

So, what's worse? Only having one choice or having too many choices? That's my question of the week and it's a tough one.

Home Again.

2007-06-25T11:46:00.000-05:00

Well, I just got home from a nine day trip to New Orleans. I'm a little pooped. To be honest, I always dread these trips. They are so long and exhausting. I hate living out of a suitcase and the showering conditions always leave you feeling a little dirtier than you were before. I always come home so excited though. I'm always blown away by my kids. They work so much harder than expected. They seek God in incredible ways. Mission trips give me a glimpse of what the body of Christ is truly intended to be.

New Orleans is doing great and terrible all at the same time. Many things had changed since last year. A lot of people had come back and it wasn't such a ghost town. More stores were open and quite a few houses were rebuilt and being lived in. A lot of houses had been completely demolished. There were houses that hadn't even been touched though. Streets were still lined with FEMA trailers and it was clear that people were very weary. They were not without hope though. They were confident that God was at work in their lives even in these unbelievable conditions. One of our sweetest moments happened one night at our devo. We had driven through the neighborhood where we worked last year. One of the work groups from last year always pulled into a Walgreens parking lot for lunch and ate under the pharmacy drive through overhang. So we decided to worship in that same spot. A man and his daughted drove by and saw us so they decided to get out and talk to us for a few minutes. He told us about his experience in the hurricane and about the friends and neighbors who had been killed by Katrina. He encouraged our work and told us that church groups were responsible for the rebuilding that had been done. When he left we were all so touched by his words. How often to you see God in a large Cajun man and his daughter? As hopeless as New Orleans may seem, God is still at work there. We believe in and worship a God of redemption, a God who rebuilds and restores. New Orleans is a testament to that.

2007-06-08T23:15:00.000-05:00

My parents gave me a digital camera as a graduation gift, so now I can put a few more photos on here. Here are some from my sister in law's fiesta celebrating her law school graduation.

Here is the lady of the evening, Hailey, along with my brother David.

This is their dog Carey, dressed up for the occasion. My brother was not amused.
Here are my lovely parents enjoying the party.
And here's a shot of both of my brothers.

This is a super close up of my other sister in law Julie and my niece Kaelan. My brother Stephen took this one. Nice job.
Well, last night I got home from our junior high mission trip. I may be more convinced than ever that the junior high years are the hardest. There was so much drama! She likes him, but he likes her, so she's mad at her, and he talked bad about her, so she told him about her and now she's mad... One of the girls said that she wasn't going to talk about people any more, and one of the other girls quickly responded with "Well, let us know when we can talk to you again." You just can't make that kind of stuff up.

Anyways, I thought St. Louis was a great city. I went up to the top of the arch and looked out over the sky line as the sun was setting. It was beautiful. We worked with some great agencies further convicting me of the need to work for social justice. Here's a picture of the teens at a food pantry.

Overall, we had a great week. We were even on the local news a couple of times. The day we worked at the food pantry a news crew showed up and filmed us working. Then one afternoon we were at the zoo and happened to walk up to the elephant area right when they were bringing out the new baby elephant for the first time. Three news cameras were there and filmed us watching the blessed event. Here's a picture of baby Jade.I was really excited about the elephant, she (or he?) was so cute. I think they said she was three months old. I just love zoos.

I want to type a few words about the Overland Park girl who was abducted at Target this week, but I'm too tired to keep typing, so I'll put that in a future post. Good night everyone.

2007-06-02T20:48:00.001-05:00

Well, I finally feel settled in and I'm going out of town tomorrow. So much for not living out of a suitcase. I'm headed to St. Louis with 30 middle schoolers tomorrow for a mission trip and I think it will be great. I'm loving being here in Kansas again. My kids and parents are the best. I'm having a great time with the other interns too.

My parents drove up here with me to spend a few days. It was really neat to show them around KC. I was really sad to take them to the airport though. There's something different about me staying and them leaving. So, when I drove out of the airport I was a little emotional and distracted and I missed my turn off and accidentally drove half way to Iowa. Yup, I probably drove for 40 minutes before I even knew I was off track. I turned around and realized how off course I was which only heightened my emotional state. It took me about two hours to get from the airport back to the church building, a trip that should have only taken 45 minutes. I still can't believe I did that. Typical Sue.

This summer we are without a youth minister. I guess some might see this as a problem, but it makes me excited (as much as I loved the old youth minister). I'm excited to see what I'm made of, although it's too late to find out that I'm not cut out for ministry. I know I'm going to learn so much this summer.

I better go work on my class for in the morning. I made posters and I'm showing a clip from The Lion King. Yay for media.

2007-05-26T21:01:00.001-05:00

I'm here. Yay Kansas!!

2007-05-22T23:06:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm in the big Lub for a couple of days. Officially, I am no longer a resident of Abilene, TX. I met someone this weekend who asked me where I lived and I said, "Uhhh... I don't know."

The last week or so has been pretty crazy. The weekend of the 12th was my graduation. It was a great weekend. My family came and we celebrated the whole weekend. We went to eat at Cypress Street (a restaurant in Abilene I never eat at because of the $$$) and it was so nice. The Abilene piano man was there playing and I remember thinking- what a great way to end my time here. My graduation was very special. Before the actual ceremony, all of the Graduate School of Theology grads participated in a covenant service- the closest thing us Church of Christers have to an ordination service. It was really special and it made me realize that I am no longer preparing for ministry, I'm there.

Last week I took a youth ministry short course. This means I went to class from 8-5 Monday through Friday and I have some papers due later on. I'm so glad this was my last class. I always dread these short courses, because they are such a beating. I'm always so exhausted. But this week was different. It actually energized me and made me so excited about my future.

On Friday afternoon I headed down to San Antonio for my sister in law, Hailey's graduation from law school. I'm so proud of her. She is going to be a great attorney. On Saturday night Hailey's parents hosted a fiesta to celebrate Hailey's big day. It was so much fun. They even had a mariachi band perform. I don't know if I've ever had so much fun with total strangers. I now LOVE fiestas!

Monday morning, my parents and I woke up early to trek back to Abilene to pack up my apartment and move everything back to my storage unit here in Lubbock. It was such a long day and we were all so tired. I felt so bad that my parent had to go to work today. Parenthood is so selfless, I don't know if I ever want kids. I don't even like doing those for myself.

Anyways, that all for now. I'm just sitting here getting pumped for my summer in Overland Park. I can't wait to see my kids!

Not Sue

2007-05-16T13:26:00.000-05:00

I am not Sue. Sue is sitting right here, but she is not blogging. I am blogging on her behalf. On behalf of Sue, thank you for reading her blog.

Yours truly,
Dave Blanchard, Esquire

2007-05-15T11:25:00.000-05:00

I am now 25.

2007-05-12T22:29:00.001-05:00

I am now a master.

awww

2007-05-11T13:22:00.000-05:00

Well, last night I was super surprised by a good bye party thrown in my honor. I LOVE surprise parties. And this was just so special. It means so much that my friends care that I'm leaving and would take the time to put together a party. Awww.

2007-05-06T23:31:00.000-05:00

Do you ever feel like you're going to open your door and see Noah pulling up on the ark? It will not stop raining around here. Now I realize I have grown up in the desert, so any rain is a lot. But lately we have thunder storms and tornado warnings every night. And it's not going to let up this week. I really need to be working on my tan and these clouds aren't helping at all.

Anyways, it's finals week. I have flashcards every where, and I'm trying to fill my brain up with as much knowledge as possible. I know I'm starting to sound like a broken record here, but I just can't believe this is the end of my time here. I have boxes everywhere and I'm starting to see people for the last time. It's weird how you can be sad and excited and scared and confident all at the same time.

Well, I wish I could close with a funny story or something, but my life is pretty boring right now. Tomorrow I'll go out and try to do something really exciting to blog about.

2007-05-01T07:12:00.000-05:00

It's May!!!! The best month of the year. Maybe it's the warm weather or the end of school that makes me love May so much. It might be the season finales to all of my favorite shows that I look forward to. I guess the truth is, I love May because it's my birthday month! On May 15th, I hit the big 2-5. That's crazy. Half way to 50. Quarter way to 100. And if you're looking for that perfect birthday gift, here it is. Season 2 of Beverly Hills 90210 hits stores today. You know how much I love my 90210. Happy May everyone.

2007-04-29T23:08:00.000-05:00

Here are a couple of pages from this week's People Magazine. The first is an ad for this week's huge Grey's event. Notice the new characters to the right of Addison. Are you going to watch her spin off?

The second page is dedicated to my mother. Since she turned 60, she keeps on saying, "60 is the new 40!" Which is very funny. This page is devoted to beauty over 60.

Happy Sixties Mom!

2007-04-26T16:56:00.000-05:00

Grey's made an awesome connection last week. During the beginning of the episode, they played a remake of the 80's song "Dancin' With Myself." True Patrick Dempsey fans will remember this song. It was playing during a very important part of Patrick's hit teen movie "Can't Buy Me Love." Coincidence?? I doubt it.

Anyways, yesterday was a big day. I turned in my last 20 page paper. I feel so much better. I just have a few more little papers and finals. I'm going to sleep in tomorrow and not feel guilty about it. :)

2007-04-14T23:40:00.000-05:00

It has been freezing around here today. Really, what is the deal with this weather?

Well, my cookies were a hit and I passed my comp. The stress and pressure have not subsided though. I have a paper due just about every other day for the next two weeks or so, including tomorrow!?! What kind of a Bible professor schedules a due date on a Sunday? An ungodly one, that's who! Just kidding... sort of.

At the end of my comp, my professors got around me to pray a prayer of blessing over me, and I totally fell apart. I started crying, actual tears (something very uncommon for me). Luckily we were praying so their eyes were closed and they couldn't see my teary display. I don't really know where this emotion came from. Maybe it's the stress or sleep loss. Maybe it's that I'm leaving in a month and refuse to even think about leaving this community. Perhaps, it's my deep gratitude towards these men who have been so instrumental in transforming my life. Whatever it was, that moment was one of those precious times in your life that you just don't forget.

Right now my future looks sunny. I'm going back to Kansas City for the summer (I don't think I've mentioned that here). I think the summer is going to be great. And, I have several prospects for the fall. Yesterday I had a phone interview with the Salvation Army in Portland, OR. The interview went well, and I think the job sounds really neat. I'm not sure if it is exactly what I want to be doing though. My other major prospect right now is a youth ministry job in Campbell, CA (outside of San Francisco). I have heard great things about the church and about the youth minister I'd be working for. Anyways, I just can't believe that this west Texas girl may become a west coaster. I know I'll be made fun of for my accent pretty often, but I can handle that. Every time I see a new job prospect, I look to see if the city has an IKEA. I do plan to spend a lot of my time shopping at IKEA once I start receiving a regular income. That makes me so excited!!

Well, I better work on papers for a little while longer tonight. I hope everyone has a great Sunday tomorrow, I'll be typing.

*****By the way, when I published this post I was visitor number 11,111. Neat-O!*****

"When you're alone and life is making you lonely, you can always go...

2007-04-11T19:43:00.000-05:00

Downtown."

I've had this song in my head for a couple of weeks now. I'm not sure where I'm hearing it, but I catch myself singing it all the time.

"Downtown, things'll be great when you're
Downtown, no finer place for sure,
Downtown, everything's waiting for you!"

Well, my make up comp is in the morning at 9:45. I saw one of my professors today and he asked me if I needed a wake up call. Funny. I've got the cookies in the oven right now to give them as an "I'm sorry I missed my first comp, please accept this bribe" gift.

It's job time. I've been sending out resumes for ministry jobs and I've gotten a couple of bites. I've heard from two churches letting me know that they'll be calling me, and I have a phone interview with a branch of the Salvation Army in Oregon on Friday. They are hiring a youth pastor. I don't really know what that job would look like, but I'm definitely intrigued.

You'll be happy to know that the blog you are reading right now has reached new levels of fame. My post from April 7 was quoted from the pulpit of an Abilene church on Sunday morning during the communion thoughts. The word crap was replaced with the words "expletive deleted," which I'm told led many people to think of the f word. I'm glad my words could lead people to such a holy place. I just want to be a blessing.

I'm Scared.

2007-04-09T09:25:00.000-05:00

Is it okay to say that? It seems like there is a moment early in life when it is not okay to say I'm scared. We're supposed to grow up and be tough and we aren't allowed to be scared anymore. When I was a little girl I was scared of men with facial hair. Isn't that weird. My fears are less tangible these days. I'm scared of the future. I'm scared I'll get a C in one of my classes this semester. I'm scared that I will finish a master's degree in ministry and not find a ministry job. I'm scared that the idea of a 'calling' might not be real. I'm scared of COBRA insurance rates. I'm scared that I'll always be dependent on my parents. I'm scared of settling for a job I hate because I need the money. I'm scared I'll get a job far away and I'll be lonely. I'm scared to grow up, but also I'm scared I'll never grow up. I'm scared of depression. I'm scared I'll never be married. I'm scared I'll never be loved.

2007-04-07T17:17:00.000-05:00

It's snowing, Abilene Texas, Easter weekend.
What the crap??

2007-03-31T00:16:00.000-05:00

So, Tuesday was one of those days. I missed my comp. Yes, my Master's degree comprehensive oral exam. I thought it was scheduled for Wednesday. I had my outfit picked out and everything ready to go (for Wednesday). But at about 9:05 Tuesday morning I got a phone call from one of my professors telling me that he was sitting there with two other professors waiting on me. I was still in my pajamas and couldn't possibly leave without a shower, so I was forced to reschedule. My professors have been very understanding and have assured me that "these things happen," but I can't help but feel totally stupid. That's been my fear about my comps all along. The truth is the exam for my degree has a reputation for being pretty easy and unfailable (I know that's not a word), but I have had this huge amount of anxiety about looking stupid in front of these professors who I really respect and love; these are my favorite professors. Anyways, not showing up definitely made me feel pretty stupid in front of them, so my plan is to make them cookies when we meet for my make-up exam. My cookies are awesome, so I know that should raise my status a few notches.

I found out something crazy yesterday. ACU actually has people on staff who spend their time Googling ACU. They are attempting to see what is being said out there about the school. I think it is really funny that there is someone getting paid to search Google all day. I do it for free all the time. Perhaps I've missed my true calling in life.

Well, I need to take a blog break for a little while. The month of April will be here in about 24 hours. All of my papers and projects are due in April. So, if I'm typing something, I had better be typing a Word document rather than a blog post.

By the way, I've lost over 60 pounds. Whoo-Hoo!!

2007-03-27T20:44:00.000-05:00

It's been one of those days.