Monday, April 09, 2007

I'm Scared.

Is it okay to say that? It seems like there is a moment early in life when it is not okay to say I'm scared. We're supposed to grow up and be tough and we aren't allowed to be scared anymore. When I was a little girl I was scared of men with facial hair. Isn't that weird. My fears are less tangible these days. I'm scared of the future. I'm scared I'll get a C in one of my classes this semester. I'm scared that I will finish a master's degree in ministry and not find a ministry job. I'm scared that the idea of a 'calling' might not be real. I'm scared of COBRA insurance rates. I'm scared that I'll always be dependent on my parents. I'm scared of settling for a job I hate because I need the money. I'm scared I'll get a job far away and I'll be lonely. I'm scared to grow up, but also I'm scared I'll never grow up. I'm scared of depression. I'm scared I'll never be married. I'm scared I'll never be loved.

10 comments:

Kelli said...

(I'm scared too.)

Kasey Lane McCollum said...

You are not the only one. I'm scared too.

kentbrantly said...

i love you, sue. :-)
ps- never knew we were afraid of so many of the same things.

Unknown said...

You're already loved. (But I know what you mean.)

One of the many who love you ---
Jill

Katherine said...

As am I...

Melody said...

Match.com :)

Ashley said...

We all have our fears. They grow and change with every stage/phase/season of life.

Confess these fears to the One who loves you the MOST and always will, the One who created you, and gave you the calling to serve Him in a special way.

I love you too!

Dustin and Allyson Wall said...

I totally agree with Ashley. Your fears just change through different stages of your life. I just try to give them to God and know He'll bring me peace. (sounds so easy, but I struggle with this constantly, too).

Unknown said...

I'm not currently scared, but I'm many, many other things that I always thought you weren't allowed to be. For instance, doubtful and cynical. Is it okay to be those things after all?

Robby and Lynsey said...

I like the honesty, dear. I love you ... but I'm still praying for you to have companionship. And I'm with Amanda. I'm feeling so many "unacceptable" things right now, too. It is comforting to me, however, that God is more faithful to me than I give him credit for. Thank you, God, for your patience!

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