Thursday, July 05, 2007
Well, I talked to him last weekend. I was missing him and decided to call. I've always loved our phone calls. We can be so honest and open, and I love to hear about his life. For years now I have longed for these phone calls, always hoping that he was thinking about me too. This call was different though. Yes, he's in a good place and I'm in a good place, and of course I was happy to hear his voice. The conversation was nice but it wasn't the same. Maybe he's changed, or I've changed, or probably both. For the first time, when I hung up the phone I had no desire to ever talk to him again. After loving him for so long, I just don't want to anymore-and I'm not sad about that. I'm not happy about it either, I just am. This is my reality- realizing the finality and accepting it. I just don't want you anymore.